Who the hell thought of teething?

Seriously is this necessary? Just give it to them in the womb when they are comfy and doped up on amniotic fluid. I don't mind risking bitten nipples, since I am already a human teething ring. Think about it...tiny, hard pearls twisting up through tender, baby gums while they can't speak or, in my case, even hold a teething ring. And what's with this freakishly early teething? James is three months old. The kid is going to be in braces by the time he's 2 at this rate.